the thing is, I don’t know exactly how to rely on my feelings anymore. not that I have them anymore. on the contrary I am overfilled with emotions and feelings and thoughts.
but I don’t know what to make of them anymore. because it ends in confusion sometimes. this is such an old song, right? you never know what to make of things. unless they just happen to you. without you even knowing, without you even realising. with or without you.
and you go out and without realizing it you throw yourself into life and then you see, the next morning how ugly it can be. if you don’t listen to your feelings. that is to much and too fast and to everything. all at the same time. the only thing you can do is to sleep it way. take a shower.
but then your hair dries up, your curls pop out and make you look all fuzzy and unpolished. but you feel better and take is a lesson you had to learn. it’s true. make mistakes. you need to make them.
and in nights like this, short before I turn one year older… it always feels a bit like new years eve. like a countdown. and I never can sleep before twelve, usually I redecorated my room the whole night. this year. I will fall asleep, not do anything than sleep, wake up, go get some errands, make dinner and then see my friends and enjoy the day! althout my reason stapeling said something else.
well, nobody wanted to go with me stealing a penguin out of the zoo.